I’m through with acting all normal
and always overlooked
It’s time to get famous
By acting like a kook
So I can see my picture in the tabloids
And my face on E!

I gonna get real big
I’m gonna make my name
And then act in ways
That seem completely insane
Drive away my fans but attract
The paparazzi

I’m gonna date Afflick and start a brand new Ben
Hang out with Paris and her fugly friend
Dump ‘em all for Angelina so Jen
Aniston gets pissed at me

I’ll get surgery around my mouth and eyes
Liposuck my tummy, chin, ass and thighs
Get every kind of enhancement then claim
I’d never let ‘em change me

I’ll do whatever I can to overhype my name
Until I’m famous just for having so much fame

Cause we all just want to be crazy pop stars
Hire a prostitute and do her in my car
I’ll have a daughter I name Moon Unit
Sing at the Super Bowl and show off my tit
And I’ll hang on my ranch in Neverland
Wear a white sequined glove on just one hand
Lead a highway chase
In a white bronco
Get my own Chris Crocker
Youtube video

Hey hey I’ll be a crazy pop star
Hey hey I’ll be a crazy pop star

I wanna whine how hard it is to be me
Get hardcore into Scientology
I may come out of the closet
Or announce that I love Katie Holmes

I’ll break a rival’s knees
So I can be the winner
Show too much skin at an award show dinners
You’ll love my work after I
die from an overdose

I’ll insult Rosie
And get into a feud
Dis Donald Trump
Or those chicks on the View

Cause we all just wanna be crazy pop stars
Share a cell with Martha Stewart behind bars
To keep my weight down I’ll become anorexic
Piss off people when I say something anti-Semetic
And I’ll buy a gerbil to indulge in sin
Change my name to symbol and then back again
I’ll shave off my hair
I will slap a cop
I’ll go to a porno
Theater and whack off

And I’ll shoplift like Wenona Rider
Get arrested nine or ten times
as a pedophile
Travel with an entourage
Of yes men and flunkies
Make it obvious that
I am a fame junkie
Hey hey I’ll be a crazy pop star

I’m gonna spout some hate
That offends my fan base
Gonna pop some pills
Or even better freebase
Get my face on the news of every TV station
When the IRS arrests my tax evasion

Cause we all just wanna be crazy pop stars
Spending untold millions to collect old cars
Drive ‘em under the influence of heroine
Go through rehab sober up and then do it again
And I’ll prove I’ve completely lost my mind
When I get engaged to Kevin Fetterline
I will pose naked
I’ll wave around a gun
To get respect as an actress
Get my breasts redone

And I’ll live up to every downward spiral
It’s the American Way
to drag down our idols
Self-destructive behavior
That you would avoid
You can vicariously face
Through the rag tabloids

Hey hey I’ll be a crazy pop star
Hey hey I’ll be a crazy pop star