Oh we met in a chatroom
And made a dating plan
Now I will meet you soon
I just hope you’re not a man
I hope you’re not a man
I hope you’re not a man

Don’t care if you photoshopped your pic
Don’t care if you’re tall or tan
Don’t care if your ugly

Just hope you’re not a man
I hope you’re not a man
I hope you’re not a man

Maybe I am close-minded sorry if I’m rude
But I’d much prefer
It if you
Weren’t a dude
Weren’t a dude
Weren’t a dude

Oh I’ve done internet dating
So I hope you’ll understand
Why I’m shy at mating
If it turns out you’re a man
I hope you’re not a man
I hope you’re not a man

And when we first met you seemed pretty all right
But I got closer
And see you’re
Transvestite
Transvestite
Transvestite

I see you got an adam’s apple
And some enormous hands
But I am just so lonely.
I’ll pretend you’re not a man
I’ll hope you’re not a man
I’ll hope you’re not a man
I’ll hope you’re not a man