Come gather ‘round fanboys
In the comic book store
And admit that you don’t know
What’s going on any more
In Marvel after House of M
And Civil War
Planet Hulk, and the
Secret invasion
Now our childhood heroes
Aren’t the same anymore
For Marvel comics they are a-changin’

In the Civil war some wanted
secret identities shed
Both sides drew lines, fought
Till it came to a head
Now there’s 50 states initiative
And Captain America’s dead
And Iron Man is S.H.I.E.L.D.’s
New lead agent
And the Hulk ruled a planet
Blew up New York and turned red
And marvel comics they are changin’

Now Mutants and X-Men
Did not have a ball
When Genosha blew up
Mutant numbers did fall
Except for one new baby
A messiah they’ll call
And in SF they are now locatin’
And White Queen’s the leader
And Xavier’s gone
And marvel comics they are changin’

Oklahoma’s now Asgard
After someone cloned Thor
While a marriage hiatus
By Reed Richards and Sue Storm
Makes a non-fanastic two
Of the Fantastic Four
And their replacements we now are namin’
As the newest wed couple
Black Panther and Storm
And marvel comics they are changin’

The Skrulls have been busy
Infiltrating too
And since they’re shape-shifters
No one knew who was who
In the lamest cross saga
Since Secret Wars 2
And of course their invasion was failin’
Their Queen was Spider-Woman and
All this time nobody knew
Oh marvel comics they are changin’

Spider-Man got a cyber
Outfit for a bit
Gave it up when the Civil War
Forced him to quit
Revealed his true name
He and Mary Jane split
He’s an outcast now and a felon
Now Green Goblin’s a hero
And Speedball’s penitent
And Marvel comics they are changin’

The stories are flashy
More comics get sold
But I miss all my heroes
From the days of old
And the way that their heroic
Tales were told
Now my inspirations are flailin’
Quite screwing with my heroes,
Put these changes on hold!
Oh the marvel comics they are changin’